Last updated 12:35, Monday, 05 May 2008

DID the condemned man eat a hearty breakfast? Was he out walking the cat, busy chewing his nails to the bone or was he locked up with his PC, updating and spinning his CV?

Just where was Gordon Brown first thing on Friday morning?

Having been thoroughly and painfully drubbed in the local elections of May 1, it would be safe to assume the Prime Minister was wasting no early morning time dancing around a maypole in Number 10’s back garden.

So, given the night he’d just had, who could have blamed him for choosing to hide his stomach-churning humiliation – for an extra hour or five – under the duvet?

Most of his party and a large section of the electorate, actually. The least he could have done was show his face.

So where was he?

Most people in this country have, at some time or other, said what they’ve liked about Tony Blair during his seemingly endless terms in office.

Little of it has been entirely complimentary. A lot of it has been bitterly critical.

But given a sudden shift in poll ratings or a bad set of election results, he could always be relied on to fill early morning radio and TV news bulletins with his spinning, upbeat, blathering, cheerleading excuses for a bloody nose.

The truth-massaged reasoning rings in our ears still. Not a vote for Westminster; not a reflection on national leadership; purely local issues; blame councillors not cabinet; mid-term protest vote; not to be taken seriously; all will be well on the night... of a general election.

But not a peep did we hear from Mr Brown – the PM thrust on the country without any election at all; the man who’d prepared and hungered for the job for at least 10 years.

Not a whisper or whimper was the country offered until late into the morning of Labour’s mourning – around 10.30am, Friday – when Gordon’s statement from the relative safety of Downing Street was made with a familiar stumbling mumbling.

“It’s clear to me that this has been a disappointing night, indeed a bad night for Labour,” he said quoting from the text of blindingly obvious.

“I think people want to be assured, and indeed people are questioning and want to be assured, that the Government will steer them through these difficult times.”

Right...

“The test of leadership is not what happens in a period of success but what happens in difficult circumstances.”

Which is precisely what voters had been telling him the day before.

“We’ve listened and learned and we will move forward,”

Oh dear. And which way is forward, Mr Brown – back upstairs and under the duvet again, delegating the rough stuff to Tessa Jowell?